This is one time where we would have happily jump in and joined the blubbering stalker-like fans seen here waiting outside of Jon Stewart for non-other than the beauty that is Jake Gyllenhaal. We love him so much, we’d volunteer to do things to him that we can’t name. What can we say – he makes us giddy and moist – at the same time y’all. And that is nothing to sneeze at.
We weren’t able to throw our own passioned pleas into the mix for having a new freelance gig keeping us from laying eyes on the most handsomest thing ever but thanks to our good buddy over at DMBJ, we can do the next best thing and bring y’all video footage (and a screen grab) of the appearance shot while yum-ness mingled with commoners.
Don’t ask us what he was plugging cuz the only thing we’d like for him to plug isn’t found at Jon Stewart!
In other Gyllenhaal news, this here alleged pic (left) of Gyllenhaal appearing to attempt a yoga stretch, in his undies, while in an undisclosed hotel room, has folks’ – and by folks we mean his attorneys – panties in a twist with their arms up in the air.
Not sure why really.
The letter, we gather, refers to something to do with “portraying him in a false light, violating his right of publicity and constituting a false designation of origin in violation of the Lanham Act.”
We don’t really know what the fuck the Lanham Act is – and less we can perform it on Jake we don’t really care – but why make mountain out of a sandcastle is our question…?
In truth, this here pic looks like something Jakey-poo would totally be doing in his hotel room. He just seems goofy like that – no harm in it. It’s part of why the world luvs him so…
It’s not like he went and spread his cheeks apart while trying to insert something. Mind you we wouldn’t object to that either – hell we’d volunteer to help!
Too much? (Just tryin to keep it real y’all.)
Unless, the outrage stems from the fact that the photo depicts him as completely uncordinated – that is grievous in and of itself! And if so, by all means sue away.
Otherwise, move the fuck on… There are more pressing issues in the world.
But go and tell homos not to do something and – well, you know how that ends…
Queerty’s official response to the cease and desist order states “we’re keeping the photo up, since it hasn’t been proven fake and because their letter bumped it from ‘funny and cute’ to ‘actually newsworthy.”
For us, personally, we prefer to look upon him in his glory – or nothing at all. Case & point, this here publicity still from “Love & Other Drugs” does the trick quite nicely.
One which we like to peruse with the lights down and when we are getting out of our own undies – but don’t judge us!
Of course it is followed by a series of illicit thoughts and acts which we aren’t going to share with y’all right this second.
But seriously, we would think folks in his camp would dissuade this type of actions by overzealous and overpriced legal folks with nothing better to do.
On the other hand – Jake G is still promoting his last flick – which we love – and we think that this is a cheap way of his folks appearing like they are working to keep him in the news by having come up with something original of their own.
We don’t mean to put it past them to have released the photo themselves…
There are better ways to spend $$$ and if you can’t come up with any on your own we would be happy to lend you a hand Jakey-poo.
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